love ridden

mood: desperately needing a bathroom. peaceful. excited about making my wings. (and i keep day dreaming about wearing 'em and putting on makeup, and i feel like such a girlie girl). REALLY needing a bathroom.
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phew.
i'm so excited about my wings. gonna be a raven. 8 foot wingspan with wings that open and close. a black fishnet shirt, over which a black tank top with the words "quoth the raven..." high up on the chest, starting under the arm and sprawling across the chest written in silver sharpie. then, in varying sizes and in cursive "nevermore" in random places. a short black skirt will be coupled with my orange and black striped tights to suggest bird feet, though punked up with the boots. my nails which have been growing out will be painted black with silver streaks. the eyes will be lined and heavily mascaraed so i will look out of the world from heavy thick black eyes and smirk cynically with full blood red lips. mascara will add temporary black "highlights" to hair swept up in two high messy buns.
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i really want sam's love. i just want to be comfy in love with him. i don't want a boyfriend, i don't want a hook up. i want love. which is infinitely harder to come by than the former. i also need to figure out what the heck is going on in my head with ian. i've obviously still got the hots for him, that much i know. but i still have the aftermath of a crush too. his profile (yes. his profile. this is middle school. gimmie a break.) anyway, it says "i think i'm in love...again." except the girl i thought he was in love with left him a comment saying "i'm so glad we got over our fight and we're friends again" so THAT doesn't make sense.
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i'm in love with rockapella. like WOAH. in love. amazing.